"Reality"

Ok guys. Really. This is reality?

So I am somewhat ashamed and embarrassed to say that I have seen my fair share of reality TV. I don't understand, but somehow the most ridiculous shows suck you in to their plotless schemes. So ladies and gentlemen, here are some of the top reality shows and their magic.

1. The Conveyor Belt of Love



This one is pure genius. It's a new one, with only one episode. Basically one guy rolls out at a time and has about 60 seconds to sell himself to 5 girls and they decide if they are interested or not. That's right, dating just got so much easier! ...? So far, a 3 out of 5 success rate! I mean really, there's no use wasting time dating the old fashioned way when you've got a conveyor belt of men!

2. Survivor


How many seasons now? 19?! And still it manages to have a different genre of drama every single time. Yeah I'm impressed. First of all I love how this looks like a family photo. It's amazing how that "love" (aka fake alliance) gets you to the end, except for the fact that everyone hates you and votes for the other person anyway. Hmmm, I can't wait to hear about the strategy that was really planned from the beginning and that actually works. Maybe I should take tips from some of these people.

3. America's Next Top Model



I was actually introduced to this blissful show my freshman year. The competition is intense as the girls try to prove that they are the most beautiful. The challenges are pretty cool tho. I mean you try acting like a gorilla and still look modelesque... I can't wait till they decide to make this show male version.

4. The Apprentice


I love how professional drama queens and kings are. It's a hard earned talent. But hey, whatever gets the job done right? And I can't get enough of Donald Trump's luscious locks! Yep. Gorgeous beyond all reason. (sarcasm inserted here)

5. The Bachelor


Ah you can't even mention reality TV without thinking about the Bachelor. I've only seen two episodes but wow! There are no words to truly express the way these people truly come to find "true" love. Yes, finding "the one" over a reality tv show is definitely the way to go. I would love to be on this show just to be a spy and tell the man what is really going on. And no, I would never fall for him.

6. America's Most Smartest Model



Yes this is the actual title. No, tragically, I have never sat through a full episode. But with the little bit I saw, they put codes on the bathroom doors and the fridges that have to do with knowing history dates. Yeah, learn your stuff or starve! Oh wait... that might backfire if they like starving...

7. The Amazing Race



I really liked watching this one to see where they got to go! But sadly they never got to enjoy the traveling part of the show since they were so busy fighting or running around madly trying to beat the other teams. But I'm definitely jealous of everywhere they went. Too bad bickering tends to ruin things like that... Hmmm weird...